NHRA: Herbert Pushes Himself Back into the 'Racing Zone' after Heartbreaking Family Accident

BRISTOL, Tenn. — Two deep-red roses, tied together with a thin, white string and wrapped in clear cellophane, rest on a countertop.

Two framed photographs displaying the bright, smiling faces of two young boys stand upright.

But Doug Herbert’s head is bowed. His shoulders are hunched over. And his hands are clenched together, wrapped tight, buried between his knees.

Herbert looks heavy. Tired. Worn.

And he’s talking about it. Again.

The accident. The day his life changed. The day his sons died.

A reporter throws out a few questions. Herbert answers, sounding numb. The reporter leaves.

Herbert then raises himself up from a leather couch, takes a few steps, and closes the door to his trailer, momentarily quieting the roar outside that is the National Hot Rod Association.

Away from the crush of the crowd, engines, horsepower and cars that have come to define his life, Herbert starts over.

“There’s a lot of people who tell me, ‘Oh, there’s a reason. God had a reason.’ I don’t know … I have a hard time believing that,” said Herbert, a 40-year-old Top Fuel driver. “I think that it was just an accident. It was just an accident, what happened. I’m not a particularly religious person. I believe in God. But I think at times like this, you really have to question things.”

Herbert looks down. Then he pauses. Then he keeps talking.

It’s the talking that gets Herbert though the dark right now. Talking is his only option.

Herbert knows he can’t change what happened on a random Saturday morning in Lake Norman, N.C., when his sons, Jon, 17, and James, 12, were involved in a car accident that took their life.

Herbert understands that he can’t bring his sons back.

But he can honor them. He can keep talking. And he can stay alive.

This is what I do
Herbert built his life around racing.

Nine career wins, 318 NHRA races and a racing-based business that bears his name.

Herbert also believes in racing.

It’s an out. When the world is too much, Herbert slaps on a helmet and a pair of gloves, locks himself in and burns.

“You’re not talking to anybody … there’s just nothing,” Herbert said. “It doesn’t make any sense: You get in a race car that goes 330 miles-per-hour and it’s peaceful? It’s peaceful to me. You’re in the zone; you’re in the racing zone.”

And Herbert’s belief in and devotion to the sport his life centers around is exactly what made it so difficult to hear the news on January 26.

Herbert was testing his Top Fuel dragster in Phoenix, Ariz., when he got a call.

The words that followed bore a message no parent should ever have to hear.

Herbert’s oldest son, Jon, was driving. Jon’s younger brother, James, was riding along. Jon tried to pass a car and moved into an oncoming traffic lane. Seconds later, Jon and James hit an approaching vehicle. They died at the scene.

“Our kids have always been our best friends and the bond between the two of us. As you can imagine, the loss we are both feeling for Jon and James at the moment is unimaginable. As brothers, they were always together and were each other’s best friend.

Our very special boys also loved their little sister, Jessie, who already misses her big brothers."

- A statement issued by Doug and his ex-wife, Sonnie, following the death of Jon and James

“There’s no bad memories”
The world went black for Herbert after his sons died.

The first three days were filled with shock. Disbelief. Herbert thought the worst thoughts and stared dead-eyed as the curtain came down.

There was also the fact he couldn’t avoid: The accident occurred a half mile from Herbert’s house. Now, Herbert would have to drive by, past and around the site where his two sons left the Earth every time he left his home.

On the fourth day, Herbert left the black behind. He made some calls. The world of auto racing is a small one, and death has touched many. So Herbert reached out.

He spoke with longtime friend and NASCAR legend Bobby Allison. Allison, like Herbert, had lost two sons. Herbert and Allison were soon talking through the pain. And Herbert found that the talking helped. He could hear himself say the words: His sons were dead. They were gone. But life kept moving.

Herbert also reached back to memories.

Memories of Jon and James together at the race track, a place they loved to be more than anywhere else.

Memories of Jon and James talking and joking with other NHRA drivers.

Memories of sharing a post-race win with Jon, father and son standing together in the winner’s circle.

“We saw [the boys] almost every weekend. We watched them grow up,” NHRA mainstay Kenny Bernstein said. “It is a family out here. We pretty much live together almost 10 months out of the year … When things go tough for someone, everybody rallies together. And it is a family, no matter what. It’s a very small world.”

The small world kept Herbert afloat.

And rather than walk away from racing, Herbert decided to press on.

He dedicated his season to the memory and honor of his sons.

And while other NHRA drivers taped-up pictures of Jon and James in their dragsters, Herbert climbed back in his car and returned to the world that made him.
“You’ve got to kind of accept what’s happened and try and make the best out of it and move forward,” Herbert said. “I still think about [my sons]. But … there’s no bad memories. Everything is good. So the only thing that is bad is that they’re not here. I don’t get to make new memories with them. But all the memories that I do have, I just think about them.”

“It’s the best thing for them”
Herbert also kept talking.

Jon and James attended a small Christian school that instructs children from kindergarten through 12th grade. Everyone knew everyone. And everyone knew Jon and James.

Herbert visited the school after his sons’ accident. He noticed many of the children were still grieving. So Herbert spoke. He talked about what he was feeling, what he’d been dealing with.

Herbert was surprised: The kids listened.

Herbert’s random oration soon turned into a regular event.

“I told the principal, ‘I feel kind of selfish coming down here and talking to these kids and taking their time,’” Herbert said. “And he said, ‘Are you kidding? It’s the best thing for them. It’s just a win-win. It makes you feel good; it makes them feel good. It helps everybody.’”

Herbert kept helping.

He formed B.R.A.K.E.S. (Be Responsible and Keep Everyone Safe), a non-profit organization dedicated to improving driver awareness among teenagers and reassessing the parent-child driving relationship.

And now, every time Herbert hits the track, he talks about his sons.

The words help Herbert remember Jon and James.

And the words help Herbert stay alive.

“I guess I’ve gotten to the point now, where every time I try and talk about the boys’ accident, I try and think about how we can do something to make a difference. Maybe help save some other kids,” Herbert said. “At first, I just couldn’t think of anything good that could happen out of it. And this, as far as I can tell, this is the best thing that I can do, to try and make something good come out of it.”

btsmith@bristolnews.com | (276) 645-2569