Stand-up comedy and four-letter words fit like stink on a hog.
Right?
Well, not for Tim Hawkins.
When Hawkins strides on stage at the Paramount Center for the Arts in Bristol, Tenn., for two shows on Sept. 11, nary a peep of harsh language will soil his performances. He’s Mr. Clean without the mop and bald head.
"Clean comedy is easy, and blue comedy is hard," Hawkins said on Tuesday by phone from his home in Lake St. Louis, Mo. "I like the challenge of clean comedy."
Full-time since 2002, years had passed before Hawkins found his niche as a stand-up comedian. Neither hunger nor inspiration in particular drew him to comedy.
"Desperation," Hawkins said. "I had tried everything else. Oh my gosh, substitute teacher, I threw newspapers, rented cars, waited tables. Then, I started doing comedy in the early ’90s. I went full-time about eight years ago."
Sounds easy. It’s not. Go ahead and step on stage and try to make strangers laugh. As with musicians who sing songs that no one has heard, initial time invested amounts to critical tests. Then, some make it, and some don’t.
"You have to try to find an audience wherever you can get one, so you say yes to pretty much everything," Hawkins said. "Then, you get your style, try to forge out a style."
Music helped to form Hawkins’ style. He said about 50 percent of his show is filled with music. But being a comedian, his music is not simply a stack of love songs.
Check it out. Hawkins’ albums include "Cletus Take the Reel" and "Tunafish Sandwich." Songs include "If Rock and Rollers Became Holy Rollers" and a parody of Brooks and Dunn’s "Boot Scoot Boogie" titled, ahem memorably, "Poop Scoop Boogie."
"It’s so ridiculous, like, people say ‘Who is this idiot?’ " Hawkins said. "I was a really big Weird Al Yankovic fan growing up. I still am. I think the thing about parodies is that fans already know the song."
Know this about Hawkins. He’s no rock star. Seriously, even one of his DVDs says so, titled "I’m No Rockstar."
"You don’t ever see Mick Jagger lost in a Hertz parking lot looking for a Ford Focus," Hawkins said. "I don’t have a large entourage."
Instead, Hawkins is a family man. He’s married with four children, each of who in particular and in general inspire his act.
"Life. My life," Hawkins said. "The dirtiest thing in the house is the diaper. The older I get, the cheesier I get, like when your dad tells a joke, and you laugh at his just trying to tell a joke."
For those who haven’t seen Hawkins perform and would rather not buy an album or DVD at first, search for him on YouTube. The free video posting and viewing site has proven immensely helpful in furthering his career.
"It’s changed everything," Hawkins said. "It’s all about leverage. You have to leverage yourself with something, and for me, it was the Internet and YouTube. I’ve got to partner with something. I had no record label. It sparked a wildfire."
Now, go ahead and look him up on YouTube. Hawkins’ humor might make you laugh, smile and feel good, but he won’t make folks cringe with a foul mouth. He’s one of a few stand-up comedians who do so, and he appears to have found an audience as a result.
"I’m happy to fill that void," Hawkins said.
TOM NETHERLAND is a freelance writer. He may be reached at
features@bristolnews.com.
IF YOU GO
Who: Tim Hawkins
When: Sept. 11, 6:30 p.m. and 9 p.m.
Where: Paramount Center for the Arts, 518 State St., Bristol, Tenn.
Admission: $22 in advance, $27 at the door; $17 per person in group of eight or more
Info: (423) 274-8920
Web, audio and video: www.timhawkins.net
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